March 21, 2018: Time....Is on My Side.

The picture above is from Remsen Kids' Days in the bi-centennial year of 1976. Kids' Days were an annual event, but the 200th birthday of our country made it an extra-special celebration in my little hometown. I remember this picture like yesterday; the warmth of my grandma's arm around my waist and my concern for my brothers’ misbehaving antics when they should have been smiling nicely.

My mom sewed my outfit of festive red, white, and blue (unfortunately my colorful shorts aren't showing). I was nine years old. Too big for my grandma's lap, but she didn't mind. And to me, it didn't matter at all. The capturing of my grandpa's smirk in response to my older brothers' shenanigans perfectly depicts the phrase 'a picture is worth a thousand words'. 

This picture is now my computer screen saver. And I smile every time I see it. A reminder of what truly matters. The people and moments we never forget when we take the time to enjoy them.

Life was golden in 1976. Time was just a secondhand nuisance with the ringing church bell as mere background noise to our childhood fun. Today I spend a lot of time carefully deciding how to spend my time. And I do have to say, it was much easier to manage in 1976.

A couple of weeks ago I was in Colorado visiting my oldest son, Zach. We were enjoying a meal at an Italian restaurant while watching the Oscar's from a screen in the bar. As the first major category of Best Supporting Actor was announced, I did a fist pump with an audible "yes!" as a showing of my agreement. My pick won.

Zach looked at me and bluntly asked, "Mom, are you this emotionally attached to all the nominations?"

Fair question.

And my answer was yes. One gets emotionally attached purely based on the number of movies I consumed last year: I saw a total of 80 in the movie theater with 52 of these at Film Streams Theaters https://filmstreams.org/  (check it out...you're completely missing out if you haven't been).

As a further example of my attachment, when the Oscar nominations were announced in January, I was up at 6:22 a.m. streaming the announcements live. I guess I am a groupie of sorts. I had already seen every movie with a major category nomination. Emotionally attached, yes, but LOVING every minute of my movie viewing prowess best describes my feeling.

(I also keep a spreadsheet list of movies seen and books read with my personal ratings)

For 2018 I decided that I needed to double my book intake as a balance to my avid movie watching. My goal is to read 50 books in 2018. And I've also added a podcast list for my drive times. Garrett joins for most movies and Grant for many (seeing a good 10+ of my Filmstreams movies by my side, he has been exposed to a lot of stories on diversity and social justice with the great conversations that follow).

Garrett and I travel frequently and also enjoy community plays and Broadway shows. We cook a lot and enjoy plenty of downtime for reading and date nights. I spend hours talking podcasts, books, and national news with my morning run gal pals. All while getting as much time with boy #3 as his social life and work schedule allows (thank goodness for Sunday family day).

The common questions I hear when I tell people of the great books, movies and activities is "How do you have time for all of this??"

Great question. Even a better question given I'm an extrovert and fill my bucket spending time with my family and friends. I do love adventures, travel, and family time. So how does this equation work? How do I feel as relaxed as my nine-year-old small-town adventurer self as I fill my days today?

The answer isn't that I don't work. I do work with a lot of great people and I love it.

The answer isn't that I neglect my husband, family, and friends. I don't. I invest in my treasured relationships every day. Yes, life is more simplistic with my kids grown and a husband who lives in Omaha, but it's more than that.

The answer is that I live a drama-free life. No posturing, politics, venting or gossiping. No drama, unnecessary emotion or game-playing. We surround ourselves with positive people and live a virtually negative-free life. Taking all this out of the picture, the quality time I have to spend on the things I want to spend time on is endless.

I fielded two phone calls last week from 'blasts from my past'. Although both were ultimately laid-back conversations, they were stark reminders of the how much ego and posturing occupied my days in the past. This brief glimpse was a warm reminder of how my I value my life of today.

People waste too many hours trying to position and politic through life situations and fabricating victims and villains who simply don't exist. By my quick estimation, I would guess that 25% of the time not reigned in is spent dealing with unnecessary crap.

From my accounting perspective, assuming 16 hours a day of awake time X 25% crap time = 1,460 of annual lost hours due to...inflated and bruised egos, toxic relationships, insecurities that seep gossip, politics in vying for position, chasing the dollar to own the buck that the other guy is chasing, etc... and so on.

That's a lot of hours. Much more than 80 movies, 50 books, and 52 date nights a year. A lifetime of living the real life can be recouped quickly. 

A friend once told me that she thought I had a child-like love for life. I took this as a huge compliment. Happiness and simple joy is the best gift I've ever been given. A recipe for pure bliss. Whether in the arms of my grandma or company of those whose lives inspire me, my life is much better when time is on my side. And only I can chose how to spend my hours.