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July 9, 2018: A Country Mile

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I have a confession to make.

I cried. I cried really hard. The ugly kind where my face scrunched up as I wailed like an inconsolable toddler.

It was as Garrett and I sat down to dinner a week ago. My brother, Matt, had left the day before to begin his new life in Arizona. It was a few days before that when my dear friend, Angelique, moved to North Dakota to start the new chapter of her life.

The hard realization was setting in that I was just weeks away from Grant moving to Colorado and life never feeling the same to me. My impending empty nest was feeling like an empty heart. So many emotions over so many changes. And although all these changes are good things, great things really, I still cried.

"What do I have to be sad about?" I continued to ask myself as I fought the tears away while making dinner. But I didn't win the fight. With my loving, sweet husband sitting across from me at the dinner table and asking  the simple question,"How was your day?", I bur…

July 1, 2018: Change is Good

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My brother, Matt, moved out of Omaha this morning. He began his 20 hour road trip to Kingman, Arizona at about 5:30 a.m. With car loaded to the hilt and fresh off of a going-away party from last night, there were few words between us. Just a quick hug and wave.

And then he was gone.

Life changes just keep marching on in my life and this is another biggie.

My brothers and I grew up close in age and close in life. Matt is the oldest and I am the youngest. There is only 28 months between our birthdays with our brother, Mark, born in between. Being so close in age, we shared friends, teachers and experiences through our childhood years. I have often said that birth order rules don't apply to us.

There is one thing the three of us share and that is a sense of humor. We fought our way through childhood, constantly trying to outwit each other with our quick tongues. We bantered and we laughed, many times at each others expense. And then we laughed some more. We could be relentless as te…

June 3, 2018: The Last Hurrah

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As my mom so famously says when it's time wrap a FaceTime conversation...
"Well, that's about it then."
Total code phrase for 'time to hang up and move on'.
On day 6 of a week long senior family trip that includes me and Grant representing our family, I am feeling both joy and a bit of angst as I close a long chapter in my life. And although I've experienced many lasts with my youngest over these last few years, the permanency has become very real as we close this trip.
In total we had 13 recent grads with their families join our excursion. TimeHop reminded me this morning of the same trip I took with Ben and classmates, 4 years ago to the day. Those four years have flew by at a pace that is now hard for me to fathom.
Zach joined us for that trip, as did many other siblings his age. We had a ball. Zach started gunsmithing school two weeks after we returned and Ben was packed and moved to Lincoln within a couple of months. The blog I wrote in August of th…

May 25, 2018: Peace Out

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So Baby has graduated. Yes, it is true. The last Lane boy birdie to leave the nest. And the weekend has been nothing short of a whirlwind of events, from baccalaureate to party to commencement. All in about a 24 hour span.

After we closed the final night of festivities with a celebratory beer and wings with our extended clan, I finally laid in our comfy bed ready for some well needed rest. Carefully reflecting on our weekend of chaos in our soft quiet, Garrett asked how I felt. He knew how much I was looking forward to this milestone for Grant and for me.

"What was your favorite part of the weekend?" he asked.

Without hesitation, I knew my answer.

"Definitely the setting up for the party with Scott, Kat, and the boys. That was definitely the best."

Garrett probed further, as I am sure he thought the beer and exhaustion had an undue influence on me.

"Really? How so?"

As we lay in the dark, I went on to relive the 2 hours of chaos in our home before our 15…

May 15, 2018: It's You Girl and You Should Know It...

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I've always been a sucker for the old TV shows. The true vintage stuff; Andy Griffith (Opie will always be dear to my heart), I Love Lucy and my personal fav...Mary Tyler Moore, just to name a few.

As I child I would nestle in with my mom or grandma and watch these shows on one of our three available television channels after carefully adjusting the TV bunny ears. When most girls dreamed of being Farrah Fawcett from Charlie's Angels, I wanted to be Mary.

As a young adult, I was given the guilty pleasure of Nick at Nite where I could watch Lucy and Ethel gobble chocolates right after watching Lou bellow "Mary!!!" from his office. Many times there was a sleeping child in my arms as I was rocking away, finding my favorite channel surfing the cable line-up. Classic TV never got old.
I haven't thought of my favorite 70's role model, Mary Tyler Moore, in a while. Other than seeing old clips and reading articles when she passed away, it's been years since I enj…

April 25, 2018: Hot Tub Time Machine

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Life is always a fun adventure. And then you blink and it's 30 years later. Or 10, or 20...

Life in 1985 was certainly different than life in 2018. Today was a reminder of this. I thought deeply on this reflection as I soaked in my backyard hot tub reminiscing on my years past and the friendships that have filled these many years in between.

Hot tub time machine...

<apologies if you don't understand this meaning...I suggest you Google>

Today was a normal day for me in comparison to my days of late. I worked with an ongoing client on building something great.  I made sure son #3 continues to survive his senior year rather than moving on to his long-awaited days of independence. And I spent time with my husband, who now lives in the same city as me (I suggest you read previous blog posts if this statement makes no sense to you). We now have the a blissful daily routine that centers around living together. These are simple life pleasures that are immeasurable from a qualit…

March 21, 2018: Time....Is on My Side.

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The picture above is from Remsen Kids' Days in the bi-centennial year of 1976. Kids' Days were an annual event, but the 200th birthday of our country made it an extra-special celebration in my little hometown. I remember this picture like yesterday; the warmth of my grandma's arm around my waist and my concern for my brothers’ misbehaving antics when they should have been smiling nicely.
My mom sewed my outfit of festive red, white, and blue (unfortunately my colorful shorts aren't showing). I was nine years old. Too big for my grandma's lap, but she didn't mind. And to me, it didn't matter at all. The capturing of my grandpa's smirk in response to my older brothers' shenanigans perfectly depicts the phrase 'a picture is worth a thousand words'. 
This picture is now my computer screen saver. And I smile every time I see it. A reminder of what truly matters. The people and moments we never forget when we take the time to enjoy them.
Life was gol…