November 13, 2019: The Neighbors

Carol, Cindy, (Shimerda girls-Anna, Sarah, Mary), me, Melanie, Barb, Nicky, LuAnn
Picture was taken at Sarah's bridal shower a few years back

With every great first meeting, there is a story. The moments in time where lasting relationships begin. This is the case with my neighbors of Elm Circle. Over the last nineteen years, we have co-existed like a close extended family. There were times when we needed each other, but was also the comfort in distance between own homes. My neighbors perfected the art of knowing the difference.

Driving away from my home for the last time, I called each of my boys. We shared these years as a family with roots that grew deep. I felt the urge to share the finality of the moment with them. All responded with encouragement, but Grant nailed it with his comment.

"Mom, it's really not about the house. It's about the people. I miss the people. You'll miss the people."

He was so right. My home was not the same, now empty of three boys and my husband (and less a dog and a cat). My saving grace were my wonderful neighbors who have always been there with abundant help and friendship.

Reminiscing on the many great memories we shared over our years, I could sum up each relationship with a distinct story of where it began...

The Rock
The year was 2001. My oldest, Zach, was seven years old and youngest, Grant, just a baby. Zach had found some neighbor boys to play with and was outside. I was trying to get Baby Grant down for a nap. I probably should have been watching little Zachary closer, but my recollection was that I was tired with three young boys with a baby who didn't want a nap.

The doorbell rang and I answered with Grant on my hip. We recently moved into the house and I was still trying to get acclimated to our new normal.

At the door was a petite Italian brunette. We had not yet met. There was no smile on her face with instead smoke coming out of her ears.

"Your sons are throwing rocks at my house! I am so mad!!"

Me: "Oh my gosh. I would be too!"

I extend my free hand.

"Hi. I'm Sandy. You must live across the street. I am so sorry."

And so it began. Yes, Zach and a couple of neighbor boys were indeed throwing rocks. They were allegedly trying to clear the house across the street from us. But instead of clearing the house, they were landing succinctly on my new neighbor's roof. She was startled as though in a war zone.

Yes, I would absolutely be mad too.

Together LuAnn and I found the boys hiding in the garage. Their bright eyes gazing at us, waiting for the inevitable consequences at their failed attempt at boyhood fun. Circle community service commenced over the next few days with Zach & Co. doing yard work at the home of their rock casualty.

At Zach's graduation party years later, LuAnn presented Zach with the perfect gift of a gift-wrapped rock.

Fast forward to this last year and my move from Omaha. I would have been lost without LuAnn and her husband, Mark. They gave a home to my cat, Abby, and they watched my house through floods, excessive snow, and the erratic postal service. They have been my rock.

A Boy
We moved into our Elm Circle home a week before Christmas 2000. Other than some snow play in the background, I didn't get the boys out of the house until the thaw of spring. When we hit a warm day in early March, I felt like I could bundle up Baby Grant in the stroller. Equipping the bigger boys with scooters, we ventured to the neighborhood park.

The boys were thrilled to get out of the house without my nagging on need for excess clothes. The park was our start to countless memories of spontaneous after-school fun and pick-up baseball games at the park ball field.

It was a cloudy day, late on a weekday afternoon. As the boys and I cleared the corner back into our circle, standing in front of us was a brown haired boy, the same size as Zach. With a moving truck parked in the circle, we quickly surmised that Zach just got the gift of a lifetime. A neighbor boy his age who would become a lifelong friend.

Our new neighbors had three boys with the youngest, Brian, the same age as Zach. Barb and her husband, Gerry, took in my son like one of their own.

Our boys grew up together with countless sleepovers, nerf gun fights, pick-up baseball games with brothers, and late night gaming. All while Barb and I shared the unspoken understanding of strange male boy tendencies that led to mess, trouble, and occasional errant rocks. There is a sisterhood between mothers of boys. Barb and I have this.

Free Peeing
Barb and Gerry moved out of the circle a couple of years ago. One night when the house was on the market, I was sitting in my back yard with my brother and niece. Hearing a voice over the fence, I see my long-time friend, Leigh, join us. I run with Leigh for years. In the heart of our running group days, I would often see her three early mornings a week. Having kids the same age, we would socialize as well. My Ben and her son, Cal, had playdates.

Leigh was newly married to Dave and came over to tell me that they bought the house across the street. Their offer was accepted and they were thrilled. Later she shared the story of how Cal remembered this circle.

"Mom, does Ben Lane live in that house? I remember getting dropped off at his house with him one time and he peed in the front bush because he had to go."

Oh, yes, the memories that were made...

Some History
My life always seems to be full of many unlikely coincidences. By complete chance, one of our new Elm Circle neighbors previously lived by us in our old neighborhood. Les and I also worked together at a public accounting firm when I started as a young CPA in the early 90's. He was a partner. I was a green accountant learning the ropes. Les was a good teacher with a great demeanor. His wife, Melanie, was kind, always warmly tending to their four young children.

I will never forget the boost of confidence Les gave me after he left the firm but before I moved into the circle. I ran into him at a city networking function. He pulled me aside and told me, unsolicited, that he was impressed with my abilities and work ethic. If I ever wanted to make a job change, to give him a call.

I never did need ask him to make good on his offer, but later his daughter came to work for me as nanny for two summers. The boys loved spending their sleepy summer mornings in the circle under Laura's fun, but watchful eye.

Les and Melanie's hospitality with their many invites to their pool had the added value of them sharing their family and friends with the circle. Nothing lit up my world more on a hot summer day than a group text invite from Melanie declaring "Pool's open!" We solved many world problems floating in their pool while enjoying Melanie's secret-recipe margaritas.

A Polka Band
Ahhh....and then there was the polka band. This was the official introduction of our neighbor, Nicky, to our circle. She was pregnant and relocating with her husband, Paul, to Omaha from California. This alone would be a culture shock. But then she met us. Culture shock squared.

Her visit to tour their newly purchased home coincided with one of the Shimerda girl's graduation parties (Shimerda's were my next door neighbors....you will meet them soon in this blog). The Shirmerda's know how to put on a party. Tom is a native of Wilbur, Nebraska, home of Czech Days. Deep in this heritage, Tom and Cindy know no proper party without a polka band.

As we swooned in their opened garage to "Roll Out the Barrel", someone noticed a car trying to find a place to park by our neighbor house with the 'for sale' sign. We had filled her seemingly empty driveway with party guest cars. Seeing a pregnant woman walk up the drive and assess the situation, we flew as mass crowd to introduce ourselves. Full of beer and questions, it was amazing that Nicky actually followed through on the home purchase.

Matthew was soon added as our baby of the circle. He only recently gave up this title, as did his mom, Nicky, as youngest circle homeowner. We later came together to be there for Paul and Nicky when Paul battled cancer just a couple of years later. We cried. We supported. We were just all there the best we could be for Nicky and Matthew after Paul passed away.

Nicky and I shared a later bound while both of us had job changes, rethinking our trek on the life script model. We both elected to leave the model and form our own. The conversations and friendship on our thinking, normal to us but radial to others, has been pure bliss. I will miss my time with Nicky, but I'm pretty certain she and I will run into each other again in another state.

The Mailbox
We moved into our Elm Circle home on a cold, snowy December day. With the moving truck following me to the house, I was attempting to back up out of the way. In my unsuccessful attempt, I nailed my new neighbor's mailbox. I completely took it out. My introduction to John and Carol was my knocking on their door with the evidence of destroyed mailbox in hand. Their answer, of course, was that they were going to get rid of that old mailbox anyway. No worries!

I still went to Lowe's and bought them a new one.

A very social, Carol, soon invited me to her first party. This was followed by many, many more over the years. She and her friends referred to each other as ya-ya's and boy, did they know how to have fun. Annual Christmas cookie exchange parties were the highlight of the holidays with Carol decorating to the hilt. Our neighbor get togethers at their house always included us marveling over John's latest home make-over project. And the pool parties....music, games, specialty drinks...all just two homes away.

Just recently Carol and I have bonded further. With me as an empty-nester and Carol, recently retired, we would find ourselves sharing life views and favorite books while floating in her pool or at a happy hour. Life is so much better without constant deadlines and instead filled with inspiration from friends. I look forward to starting an on-line book and other-interest club with Carol (more to come on that).

A Christmas Ornament
How do I even start with the Shimerda's? Tom and Cindy have three girls to my three boys. Our first introduction was a thoughtful gift. Delivered by little Anna, it was a Hallmark ornament celebrating our first Christmas at our new home. The thoughtfulness continued with yearly May Day baskets, annual invites to the Kolache Open and Halloween parties. I always knew Tom and Cindy were just an arms reach away for any need I had.

Polka bands, backyard laughter, talks over weed pulling. Their friends became my friends over all the years and all the parties. With my boys younger than the Shimerda girls, I had the playground equipment and trampoline in my backyard. Strategically placed, there was a latched gate in between our properties. Every party included kids going back and forth between our yards.

On one particular Shimerda girl graduation, I came to the party late. Recently divorced, I sat at the table drowning my sorrows with Cindy's brother, Ron. He was in town from California for the festivities. Cindy's mom was in town from Kansas as well.

Ron and I found ourselves lamenting on our love lives over wine at the kitchen table. Ron is a winemaker. He and Cindy's mom kept refilling our glasses with his wonderful grape creations. Soon I realized that everyone else had left the house for a piano bar. Ron and his mom stayed back with me. It was just the three of us. I felt the warm blurred lines on whose family and friends were whose.

I love the Shimerda girls and their love for life. I am grateful for social media for allowing me to continue to see their adventures and the adorable grandkids. Along with Tom, Cindy and their extended crew....they will always be like family to me and I will be forever grateful for their love and support.

I am going to stop with a little video and our final shot (Fireball). As is typical, it is rare to get everyone in the circle together, but always good to end a good run with a bang :)

Video....