Tales of the Ordinary Days

Fam picture - Christmas 2018 (Garrett gets photo cred) I chatted with Kat on Christmas Eve. She’s my kids’ stepmom and my ex-husband’s wife. By my estimation it’s been at least five months since we’ve spoken. Like a couple of old college friends, She and I quickly caught up in the five minutes before I had to take off. Recently I commented to a friend on how weird it was to not have routine interactions with my ex, Scott, and his wife, Kat. With no school activities, sports, or the coordinating of kids, the frequent phone calls and texts have stopped. No more sitting in the bleachers together at football games or coordinating holiday breaks. As weird as it sounds, I miss this. But then I remind myself that the lack of having a reason to talk to each other is a good thing. It is a sign that our sons are doing just fine. We have no worries or issues that warrant discussion as co-parents of adult children. The boys are all doing their thing, happily flowing in their individ...

Day 29 | 30 Days of Writing Grant's Instagram...loved this post. We miss you, Ben Lane! I can't believe it has been 29 days of writing and 15 days on our road trip. Seriously? Today was a bit of a marathon, but with a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. I will start at the end and work my way back. It is 9:51 pm and we are getting ready to go to bed. Down for the count at a Country Inn and Suites in Greeley, Colorado. This will be the 15th consecutive night at either a hotel or guest bed. And all with a seven month old pup at our side. Not an easy feat, but Zeke has been unbelievably well behaved, until I jinxed it by saying last night that he hadn't gotten up in the middle of the night for a while. Our sweet Zekerdoodle responded with a wake up call at 2 am (thank-you, Garrett, for taking care of him). He is now outside with Garrett again for the second time in a hour after whining by the hotel door (Garrett creds again). Time to go home. The hotel is...

Day 10 | 30 Days of Writing The infamous Halloween house display (missing a few finishing touches still packed away in storage bins) I got a call tonight while out to dinner with friends. "Mom, are you still buying Halloween houses every year? You're putting them up this year, aren't you?" After figuring out that Grant's random call was in reference to my beloved Department 56 Halloween house display, I was a little befuddled on the call. Being the mother of boys, I don't get a lot of sentimental comments on my annual holiday decor. "I don't know. Why do you ask, Grant?" To my shock there was still enthusiasm in his answer. "Zach and I are at Target and they have Halloween houses out. You should get a new one. And you have to put them out? It's a tradition!" Just maybe all my years of going over-the-top on my favorite holiday, Halloween, has passed on to my sons? I beamed all the way home at the prospect. My fi...

Caption of photo: Miss Daisy Driving (Zach and my recent Vegas/Arizona road trip to visit my parents) A friend recently posted a quote that has stuck with me. "The key is not to prioritize what's on your schedule, but to schedule your priorities." - Stephen Covey Too often, I have let my schedule run my life. Not always, but more in my past than I'd like to admit. And I am not in the minority with this offense. It is more common for people to let their days run them, rather than them running their days. Priorities. This last month has been a win for me in the priority management category. There were many great times with my husband, kids, parents, friends. This feat did require planes and a lot of careful planning, but a success. Zach has turned the page to 24, Ben safely past the age of 21, and Grant a golden 17. Although my three sons live in three cities, we found a way to uniquely celebrate each April birthday. My husband finished his teaching st...

Zach driving Jim to Colorado last spring. En route to Jimi's new home.  A boy and his dog. I have thought of this phrase often observing Zach and his brothers with their dog, Jimi (the Hedrix version of the name). Although I have always loved this sweet dog, he was not mine. The boys' dad added Jimi to their family shortly after we divorced. But it didn't take long to fall in love with this amiable canine personality. Introduced in the stands of a grade school baseball game, I instantly knew why my boys were so drawn to this sweet pup. An epitome of the lovable lab from the movie, Marley and Me, Jimi never met a stranger and affectionately welcomed everyone he encountered. Those eyes would look at you for acceptance and affirmation in the form of a quick pet and rub under the ear. That's all it took and you had a friend for life. Jim was a good dog. I distinctly remember texting my sister-in-law, Robbie, asking how the boys were doing shortly after beginnin...

Friday night lights at Skutt Catholic Moylan Field I love this time of year. Hoodies and fleece blankets are officially pulled out, ready for football games and bonfires that fill our weekend nights. Kids and parents have now nestled into a new school year. School spirit fills the air. My youngest son is now a junior at Skutt Catholic High School. His road to completing high school is becoming shorter. Past the halfway point of his high school journey, the days tick away as my journey through these fun years is coming to an end as well. My oldest, Zach, began as a fresh-faced freshman in the fall of 2007. Since then, not a year has passed that I haven't had a son walking through the halls of Skutt. Living one mile from the school, door to door, I have been blessed with a home brewing with constant activity as an extension of the school. From pasta feeds in the backyard to a meeting place for kids before and after school events, I have enjoyed every minute of the teenage cha...

Day 90 of my '90 days off' started with a 6:00 a.m. wake-up call from our alarm clock. Deep in sleep, I was unaware where I was at; Omaha, Denver, Remsen? My slumber was brought back to pleasant reality with a soft kiss to my forehead followed by Garrett rolling out of bed. Definitely Denver. And I'm an adult. Childhood years in Remsen are behind me. Garrett worked on his computer in the next room while I finish a great book. In the dark of early morning, 'When Breath Becomes Air' lit up my iPad and my conscientiousness as I read the final words of the book as told by Paul Kalanithi and his widow, Lucy. This book was particularly meaningful to me as I had just met Paul's family when visiting my parents in Kingman, Arizona. It covers life and death, so eloquently written by the young neurosurgeon who died just a year ago at age 39. As a new staple in my 'must read' library, this book follows the great work of Atul Gawande. It reinforced to ...

My view as I come down the steps each morning The bliss of home life and warmer weather has set in for me. A little routine and sunshine goes a long way. We will be on the road again tomorrow, so I have soaked in my short-lived downtime in Omaha. Meetings on my listening tour continue. Each refreshing with great takeaways. Tuesday consisted of a lunch with a philanthropic leader. I learned about many great initiatives taking place in Omaha. Other meetings over the last two days included many great people I have worked with over the years. From healthcare attorneys to CEO's, I was all ears. I would be remiss to not talk about my kids. My silence in relation to them as of late isn't because they're not around. In fact, they are very much around and I am very much present. A great gift of my 90 days off. I think Grant has warmed up to having his mom around the house a lot. We have gotten into a very nice rhythm. George is orange and Randy with black (pretty cute, ...

Super Bowl festivities on Day 62 Today is Day 62 of my self-imposed, but mandatory, 90 days off. Many are aware of this 90 day adventure. To others, this may be new news. My time off has been described as many things; from 'mental detox' to 'my sabbatical' to 3 months of 'living abroad'. I would agree to any of these descriptions. Each passing day has proven to have a flavor of something different, covering a wide spectrum of feelings. The key points surrounding my time off is that for 90 days 1) I'm not working (like a paid job) and 2) I'm not making any major decisions. The magic behind what triggered the 90 days and the adventures leading up to Day 62 will be covered in future blogs. Lots of thoughts and learnings to share, but too much for tonight (especially given my limited time to focus and write between Super Bowl pass snaps and commercials). Know that it has been 62 days of happiness with lots of self-discovery going on; with clarity i...

Grant at a Creighton game ~ Fall of 2007 Baby Grant got his school driving permit yesterday. My days of carting kids and playing taxi driver are almost behind me. A bitter sweet time. Although I will be gaining a new found freedom, I have actually enjoyed this car time with the kids. But instead I am reminded daily that my youngest is now a young man, not a child, and that he is no longer just the tag-along little brother. He played that role well for many, many years. From the toddler to junior high, Grant watched hundreds of baseball, basketball, and football games with his brothers on the field. Grant's vantage point was typically in the stands, under the stands, or behind the stands. With his dad as coach for many of the teams, Grant would also tag along to practices; learning great skills in keeping himself busy and finding fun in people and things on his own. Now almost 16, this training has served Grant well. He never lacks for something to do and is quite skilled,...